IC CONTACT.

[handycapable]

VOICE TEXT MAIL ACTION

© TESSISAMESS

Comments

text;

[demonicmiracle]

Sterling's going on about space pirates, how full of it is he?

text;

[handycapable]

What the Hell is a space pirate? Like in Star Wars?
You sure it wasn't space AND pirates?

[demonicmiracle]

Pretty confident it was space pirates
He's quite drunk

[As if that explains it.]

text

[undiagnosed]

DO NOT FUCKING LIE TO HIM RAY I WILL KNOW

text

[handycapable]

What are you even telling him?! How you crashed the ship and ruined my life??

Re: text

[undiagnosed]

oh i forgot about that part

text; sometime after their first meeting

[fanoperator]

Archer tells me that we should fuck.

1/2

[handycapable]

He did?
We should?
Wait, he did? Archer did????

[ Ray's torn between worrying if the other shoe is going to drop (knowing Archer it's definitely possible) and not wanting to blow this. It's fine, Gillette, just be cool, be... normal... ]

2/2 (cw mild transphobia)

[handycapable]

And you're a guy?

Um. Sorry if that's rude. No disrespect to however you happen to self-identify.

1/3

[fanoperator]

Yes, we were discussing whether the local housewives fuck (if they do, it is joylessly and only for procreation), and I suggested that he try other new arrivals, since I only just met my husband and would be delighted to cheat on him, so surely other housewives must be in similar circumstances, and he said that you would probably be interested in enabling adultery.

2/3

[fanoperator]

[Okay, he does think that's a bit rude, though he understands the confusion. He just doesn't know how to reply. The terms he understands from his own culture don't translate at all into this new setting, and so the labels he has for himself back home will mean nothing here.]

...

3/3

[fanoperator]

It's a bit rude. I have a penis and no vagina, if that's what you're asking.

[Beyond those specifications, it's... complicated.]

text

[undiagnosed]

so how badly did you biff it with huaisang

text

[handycapable]

[ He's not even mad right now. Can't even be mad. ]

It went pretty well actually!

Re: text

[undiagnosed]

[okay kind of disappointing ray didn't fuck it up and humiliate himself for archer's amusement, but whatever.]

cool so you owe me one then

voice

[thevalley]

There's guns at the hardware store.

[YEP. THAT'S IT THAT'S THE MESSAGE.]

voice

[handycapable]

Oh, thank God. Are they any cheaper than the ones down the department store? Not that they aren't all pretty cheap, but...

[ For the year and for how much money Ray currently has, things are somewhat tight until he locks down a paycheck from somewhere. So annoying not to even have a credit card. ]

I hate not even having one gun in the house, y'know?

[thevalley]

I know.

[With a clear tone of foreboding, like she knows shit is gonna go down. There's a pause and she says.]

I dunno, they wouldn't fucking sell it me.

text

[undiagnosed]

did you do meth
or smoke some new strain on weed crossed with nyquil

are you done being a freak yet

text

[handycapable]

No, no, and yes!
Obviously!
I don't want to talk about it.

Re: text

[undiagnosed]

I don't either
I got my tactlecane
That's weird, right?

text; @crowley

[demonicmiracle]

Want to help me ruin Sterling's life?

text; @gillette

[handycapable]

What's the plan?

audio, some ungodly time in the night

[undiagnosed]

RAYMOND! REMEMBER WHEN I SAVED THE WORLD AND YOU IDIOTS DIDN'T?! [archer laughs loudly then there's a loud thump.] Ow! Shit, my scotch--!

[the line cuts out abruptly.]

@mulberry; text

[fanoperator]

More people have gone missing--are you and Ellie okay?